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April 12

ᐉᐉᐉApril 12 Half-Nude Florida Man Wearing Underwear Marked

Stay cool, Florida man. On April 12, a police officer in Port St. Lucie, Florida pulled up in a chaotic pickup truck … and found that a half-naked driver, surrounded by sexy paraphernalia and dressed in clothes, saw more than he expected. underwear with the words “Breathalyzer” and the words “Blow Me” near his genitals.

According to a police report found by St. Lucy County Sheriff’s Officer Lane Drowdy, Lane Drowdy spotted a dark Dodge truck driving down the lanes of US Highway 1 at around 3:10 a.m., prompting Drowdy to turn on his patrol car’s headlights. and try to stop the truck. According to the report, the Dodge did start decelerating almost to a stop, but only long enough for the driver to open the door and throw an unidentified black object out of the vehicle before picking up speed again. (The object was never found, despite an attempted search.) A block later, a Dodge driver stopped a truck in front of the Best Western, whereupon Drowdy ordered the driver to get out of the car and put him on board. handcuffs, the report said.

It was then, according to the report, that Drowdy noticed that the man, who was soon identified as 54-year-old Daryl Campbell of Fort Pierce, Florida, was not only barefoot, but was wearing only a shirt and the aforementioned novelty. underoos. While Campbell claimed to have just woken up and was about to help a friend fix a flat tire, Deputy Drowdy noticed that the middle-aged man not only had dilated pupils and nervous demeanor, but also showed off some sort of well-combed tire. Gel-like hair is not common in those who have recently woken up. Believing that Campbell might be under the influence, Drowdy asked the man if he would conduct a field sobriety test; According to the MP’s report, Campbell laughed and refused, claiming he had gout. He then refused to allow a deputy to examine him for a disability, which prompted Drowdy to arrest him on drunk driving charges.

It was then that the traffic stop made the next sharp turn to the right of the norm. After locking Campbell in his patrol car and searching Dodge, the report states that Drowdy stumbled upon what he described in his official report as a “penis ring” without a quote under Campbell’s wallet in the center console of the truck, as well as a handful of condoms (hopefully unused) scattered throughout the car, and – perhaps most creepy – binoculars on the passenger seat. A bag of white powder was also found in the center console, but (somewhat surprisingly) a police report says it tested negative for drugs.

Campbell, who reportedly asked Drowdy what he could do to “make it go” when the deputy returned to the patrol car, then immediately refused to provide a urine sample and resisted further attempts by Drowdy to get tested for drug use, was discovered two previous DUI convictions, as well as a previous case of unwillingness to donate blood or a urine sample or to donate a breathalyzer. (According to TSG, he also has a previous conviction for possession of cocaine and carrying hidden weapons.)

He was ultimately quoted as counting his third DUI in ten years and also refused to agree. However, “general weirdness” remains perfectly legal in Florida.

Every Day is Florida Man Day:

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